


Quintessence

by Kagato



Category: Persona 3, Persona Series
Genre: Existential Angst, I'm not confirming anything after the ending, Kind of depressing like slightly, M/M, Or maybe we just have different ideas on what is bad or not, Spoilers for the latter part of the game, These tags sound so scary but it's actually not that bad, take it how you will
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 19:15:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11191632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kagato/pseuds/Kagato
Summary: Ryoji contemplates on his existence.





	Quintessence

**Author's Note:**

> The first fic I have ever published anywhere, so please don't be too harsh. Thanks. Sorry I had no idea how to summarise it so it's just a short sentence as the summary.
> 
> Something I did as an experiment, from the first line "I wonder, just when did my 'home' change from being a place to a person?" Just expanded from there and turned into a weirdly contemplative Ryoji fic. I originally intended for it to be a fluffy piece but it turned out like this instead.

I wonder, just when did my 'home' change from being a place to a person?

A wonderful saying, yet for me that saying has never been true. My 'home' in human terms would have always been a person.

I was born to be the Appriser of Nyx, the harbringer of Death. Yet, I gained a personality, thoughts and even— though I loath to admit it, true feelings. The identity called Ryoji had been formed in those short days spent with all of them, especially my previous host. Yes, that was where I was truly created, as a human, as Pharos..... as Ryoji.

The psyche truly is such a strange thing, many humans have formed theories on what the psyche is. From what I've read from my short time in this world, the time given to me for the sole purpose of bringing my Mother, Nyx, into this world. Aristotle holds that the soul, the psyche, is the form, or essence of any living thing. That it is not a distinct substance from the body that it is in. That it is the possession of soul of a specific kind that makes an organism an organism at all, and thus that the notion of a body without a soul, or of a soul in the wrong kind of body, is simply unintelligible.

 

* * *

 

Does that mean, as a heretical existence, gaining a soul despite not being a living being and forming bonds with others that had such was never to be. Why was I given an existence, when it would be torn away from me so quickly. No, memento mori, remember that you must die. That was always your favourite saying, everyone called you morbid and such, but truly as the harbringer of death, Thanatos. Your words suited me more than anyone else, I suppose it in itself was what sparked our attraction, our similar mindsets. Yet, in a different way, it could also be due to the fact that you were my host you gained that mindset. Or would it be I gained that way of thinking from living inside you for so long. Not that I am alive of course. As much as it pains me to even consider that thought. I suppose that I have become attached to this form, this soul of mine, it is such a shame that it will have to disappear. Despite that, I have no doubt that these memories of mine will last forever somehow, I wonder why that is so.

To you, whom gave me form. My deepest thanks, for forming a bond with me as Pharos, someone so obviously suspicious. I was given life thanks to that bond, and once again in my current form, as Ryoji, you formed yet another bond with me. Even stronger this time. Yet, fate is so cruel, to have revealed to me who I truly am— no, what I truly am. A lowly shadow, not meant to be in this world. The kindness everyone has shown me revealed the true value of this world to me, the bond formed with you, true happiness. Even so, all good things come to a end. Our time together spent in bliss has ended, the betrayal on the faces of those whom I considered friends will linger until I disappear. As much as my soul calls out to you, my dearest, my appearance signifies the Fall and in return, my Mother, Nyx, calls out to me stronger than ever.

 

* * *

 

Letting out a white puff of warm breath out into the chilly winter air, the lone boy leant against the railings of the Moonlight bridge. Feeling truly alone, he stared up into the sky as the sunset that dyed the whole sky crimson turned into the dark cloudless sky and basked under the light of the bright calming moon. Then, as it gave way to dark clouds that surrounded any empty space in the sky, the eerie sickly green and yellow moon that gave off a faint green glow and the world became coated in blood, the young man stood up properly and stared at the unusual moon.

"No, I really should not be thinking of such things now." He shook his head as he spoke, shifting his signature yellow scarf slightly with his movement. He headed off for an unknown destination, leaving behind only soft muttering as his parting words.

"Only a few more days to the 31st, I hope you have made your decision. My fate lies in your hands, _my dearest_."

 


End file.
